The little things mean the most......

One thing I sat back and realized today, is that over the past year I have learned to appreciate things a LOT more than I used to.

I think back to all the days I feel like now were wasted..... so many over the past few years, because I was sitting here in front of this computer, or just sitting around the house, depressed, worried and worn out.

I was missing out on a lot of the world.... I don't want to do that anymore....
I spent way too much energy on something (and someone) that didn't need it, and although I can't take it back or change it, I can make it a point to live differently every day, from this day forward.

Maybe also it was because the days... they were all the same... the days just ran together like colors turning to black. Falling into a hole. Depression turning away. Anger. Cold. Bitter.
But now, now I have decided to LIVE. I have decided not to worry about things I can not change, and not to let them affect the rest of my life and those who I love.

I want to savor every single day. I want every second to last longer. I want to see, smell, taste and touch every moment. I want to do everything I can to keep them from slipping away.... I want to really LIVE every single second.

Today I took my daughter fishing... it was wonderful...
the sunshine was hanging in the sky, along with a few marshmallow puff clouds.
It was not too hot, not too cold.
The smell of the lake drifted in on a cool breeze, crispy and fresh like clean sheets.
The water rippled in the lake, and boats of all sizes buzzed up and down the channel like a busy highway.
The world was so bright, and my daughter is so inquisitive and appreciative of every last bit of it, and I was there enjoying every single second of it beside her. I didn't have a camera along but I was capturing those seconds in my memory and I hope they will stay there forever.

Sometimes we don't appreciate the little things enough. Sometimes we don't realize how wonderful they are until they are gone. I don't want to lose these precious moments sharing nature and time with my baby. Before I know it she'll be grown and gone and I don't want to spend those days wishing I had done this or that with her.... Instead I'd rather spend them remembering all the fun times we had, all the things we did, and also planning to do them all again with her children.